Dating finding help love single tip

Anyone who has been through a breakup will have run into advice telling them to get back in the saddle, the logic being that a rebound relationship stops you thinking about the heartbreak.

Yet, in practice, these relationships are more likely to add fresh hurts than they are to heal the old ones.

It’s easy to slip into a thought pattern where not having a lover equates with being unlovable.

Yet, being single reminds you that love isn’t just confined to romance.

Being single gives you the chance to discover how amazing the solo life can be.

You have freedom to make major life changes as needed and power to please yourself without compromise.

Healing can’t be done for you by someone else; you have to allow yourself the space to process what went wrong, and how it’s going to be done right in the future.

Expecting someone else to make you whole (and vice versa) smacks of co-dependency.

You realize that being single is not scary, and that embracing it will bring you so much more happiness than you would get from settling for the wrong person.

And, should you meet someone who makes you want to change your single status, you’re in a position to act on it – you’re far better placed than the person in an unhappy relationship who must first go through a breakup and heartbreak before they can think about dating again.

Indeed, without a partner to automatically turn to in times of need or celebration, you begin to notice how much other love is all around you: it can come from friends, family – even from yourself.

By noticing the value of this platonic love, you’ll not only find yourself happier being single, you’ll be a better partner when you do meet someone – for, rather than relying on them to bring love into your life, you’ll be inviting them to share the love you already have.

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  1. This evidence builds nicely on research showing that individuals with high attachment anxiety are better able to sever their emotional attachment to an ex-partner when they start a new relationship (Spielmann, Mac Donald, & Wilson, 2009).

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